Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Expect the Unexpected

Blogging is something I can control. Perhaps it is the only thing I can control these days. One side effect of blogging is that I find myself composing blogs in my head throughout the day. Sometimes it's a welcome distraction, sometimes it reduces stress, sometimes it makes me laugh, sometimes I cry, and sometimes it makes me snap back into reality.

Today was fairly uneventful. The boys woke up earlier than I prefer. I lay in bed waiting until absolutely necessary to get up. The boys were full of energy. I continued my sanitizing kick. I sorted through clean laundry (BIG THANK YOU to Marva the laundry/ironing goddess!) And then my wonderful mother-in-law swooped to the rescue to take the younger 4 to the movies. William and I had some peace and quiet. He watched T.V. and I worked on packing suitcases.

My family has a family reunion next week. My boys have been looking forward to it for 2 years. We've decided I will take the 4 boys and go fill my bucket with the special love and support that only family can provide. I decided to try to get packed today even though we leave on Friday because William has a clinic visit Thurs. that I had the sneaking suspicion would possibly last longer than expected. Did I really say "expected?" I obviously have a slow learning curve. Nothing with cancer can be expected! READ ON...

William seemed fairly lethargic today so he spent most of the day on the couch. At 4 pm I took his temperature--something we do 1-2 times a day just to be vigilant parents. I just bought one of those nifty thermometers that you just swipe across the forehead and you have a reading in seconds. But I'm not totally there with the trust factor of it. If he reaches 100.4 I must call the doctor immediately and he is admitted to the hospital. His temperature was 101.4. I panicked. I took it a second time. Same temp. I ran and got the oral thermometer. Same temp. Tried again. Same temp. See a pattern? Denial and control!

I called the doctor and was told to pack a bag and get to the hospital immediately. They would be expecting William in 45 min. The protocol for this is a follows:
1) Fever: usually means infection (probably since he has no white blood cells right now)
2) Automatic hospital admittance
3) Blood and urine tests to determine if any bacteria/infection present
4) Antibiotics started by I.V. within 1 hr. of arriving at the hospital
5) Minimum 24 hr. stay while receiving antibiotics and awaiting lab results
6) If negative, he can go home if his blood counts are up
7) If positive, he stays in the hospital for 10-14 day on a continuous antibiotic I.V.

I'm a mess. I started crying. I know the hospital is always a possibility, but he seemed to be doing well. And then, as I'm scrambling around my room throwing things in a bag, I'm composing funny titles and things to put on the blog about this. Seriously, folks! I think I'm losing it. I guess the DS is William's coping mechanism and the blog is mine. I know exactly what's going on around me, but in my head I'm finding a nice little corner to process things. And to make matters worse, I can't even remember the funny things I thought of. I guess I laughed in my head and moved on!

So far we know his urine has small amounts of bacteria which signal a possible infection but not enough to be sure. The doctor was notified and he's waiting for the rest of the labs to make a final analysis.

So we wait again. I feel a little like I'm living the movie, "Groundhog Day"! In the meantime, I've found what I can control: a list of what to grab when running out the door for an unexpected hospital stay.

Included on my list that I missed tonight:
cell phone wall charger
pillow-(makes such a difference at night on a crummy recliner bed)
Simba-William's stuffed lion


  1. Praying that he can come back home soon. Does this mean no reunion this year?

  2. Julie, you amaze me! Your family is in our prayers all the time. Hope your boys and yourself still get to enjoy the reunion. Sending you lots of hugs and kisses!

  3. Julie,
    I have not yet met you, but met William last year in my daughter's class (Kayla Garcia is my daughter) - what a sweet boy! I have been reading this since you started and you are absolutely amazing! Your strength and views on life are inspirational! You and your family are in our prayers! Hang in there, William...we are praying for you!

  4. julie, you're an incredible writer, i'm totally entertained by your blog (laughing out loud sometimes) as well as very insprired and uplifted.
    i'm glad it's a corner for some sanity.
    love you tons. praying for you tons

  5. In the hospital again!?! You poor things! I hope it isn't serious enough to warrant a 2 week hospital stay. Your posts are so entertaining, uplifting, heartwrenching, inspirational. you'll have to make this into a book when this trial is all behind you. We are always praying for William and your family.

  6. Check the latest mormon message video on called "good things to come". I couldn't help thinking of you and your family.

  7. Thanks, Audrey. That was perfect. I just watched it and it was exactly what I needed. I just love Elder Holland.

  8. I have a good friend who used blogging to help her cope with her divorce. It really does help to write it down and put it out there.